Love it or hate it, Valentine’s Day is nearly here! So I’ve teamed up with 13 lovely ladies to bring you a special Valentine’s blog series – from gift guides to outfit inspiration, romantic tales to poetry, we’ve got you covered. This is something a bit different for me, but I’m an old romantic, so couldn’t let the soppiest time of the year pass uncelebrated!
When February comes around, do you start to hear your other half spouting phrases like “there’s no point in Valentine’s Day” and “it’s a money-spinning con invented by greetings card companies…” Need I go on? We’ve all heard this kind of thing at least once. And to be fair, on first thought, you can be forgiven for thinking Valentine’s is modern-day commercialism at its finest, when adverts for mostly unwanted pink and heart-covered novelty gifts are everywhere. The constant consumer cycle forced upon us doesn’t help. Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Easter, Halloween… You’ve barely put away the Christmas tinsel before the Valentine’s displays are adorning every shop window. The ‘special occasions’ are turned around so quickly, they no longer feel that special.
But make the effort to think again, and don’t let modern-day cynical consumerism ruin the occasion. I won’t give you a history lesson, but Valentine’s Day isn’t actually a modern invention. It has its origins way back in Roman times and became associated with romance and gestures of love as early as the 14th century. So who are we to argue with hundreds of years of love-drenched history and tradition?!
And it’s really only about money if you want it to be. When my 5-year-old son asked me last week about Valentine’s, I didn’t say “Daddy and I will buy each other presents.” I explained that Mummy and Daddy will take the time to do something special for each other.
That’s what Valentine’s means to me, it’s what I preach to others, and why I always get a little sinking feeling when I hear people say that they hate Valentine’s Day and don’t see the point.
Life is so busy, and even with the best of intentions, things get pushed to the bottom of the pile. And often, that’s relationships. You need to go to work, look after the kids, do your housework… and after all that, you’re exhausted. How often have you been guilty of just zoning out to a boxset or scrolling on your phone after a long day – and your partner is likely sat next to you doing the exact same thing. You might be in the same room, but it’s as far from quality time as you can get.
Call me an old romantic, but Valentine’s is a great opportunity to think about your relationship and to shake up old habits, and is an often much-needed reminder not to take each other for granted. Gifts are great, but for me – these are the reasons to bother with Valentine’s:
Make the time
Whether you celebrate or not, Valentine’s Day is a well-known occasion. So chances are, you’re going to end up with a free weekend – your coupled up mates will be planning romance, your single ones might be doing ‘Pal-entines’ and if you have kids, Grandparents may well be offering to take them off your hands for the evening. So seize the moment – take the time to do the things you miss as a busy couple, or the things you often think about doing but time or circumstance don’t allow.
It could be a couple’s massage, a partnered dance class, a nice meal out, a countryside bike ride – it doesn’t matter what it is, as long as you’ve made the time to prioritise each other and focus on shared pleasure and intimacy. It sounds silly but, as parents of two young children, conversation between my husband and I can often be practical, child-focussed and fleeting, so when we get the chance, we love to just have a bottle of wine and a really good old chat!
Say the words
Some people aren’t great at expressing their feelings, some people aren’t keen on being overly affectionate and some people just can’t find the words. And sometimes these habits can lead to partners feeling unloved and unappreciated, even if they’re adored. So Valentine’s is a great little reminder to push yourself, and let your partner know exactly how you feel about them.
If you can’t say the words out loud, writing them down is just as good. Thoughtful words, right from your heart, is a gift that money can’t buy.
Reminisce, and look forward
For long term couples, Valentine’s is a wonderful opportunity to reminisce on the memories you’ve made and moments you’ve shared. And you can keep those memories alive by doing something thoughtful on the day – cook a meal you had at your favourite restaurant, go back to the place you had your first date or make a playlist of all the tunes you danced to on your summer holiday, and enjoy re-living those special moments.
And it’s also the perfect time for all couples to look to the future, too. To daydream about trips you’d like to take, activities you’d like to try together – to plan an exciting future as a couple.
So the next time you hear someone starting to say that Valentine’s is nothing more than an excuse for shops to sell over-priced roses, show them this post and remind them that there’s so much more to it, if they care to look.
Day 1: A romantic Sardinian Getaway by @perselem
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Day 2: A Valentine’s Day Poem by @bamboopanda27
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Day 4: Things to do this Valentine’s for singles, couples and groups by @mybreakingviews
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Day 5: A guide to Valentine’s Day on a budget by @kellyreportblog
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Day 6: A Valentine’s dessert recipe by @karaleecupcake
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Day 7: A simple gift guide for Valentine’s by @mrssleejones
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Day 9: A gifts (or not) Valentine’s guide by @_itsjustjessie_
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Day 10: A Valentine’s gift guide by @cozystylist
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Day 11: A Valentine’s make-up tutorial by @themakeupbybeth
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Day 12: Valentine’s inspired outfits for women by @_athenachristy
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Day 13: What my parents taught me about relationships by @chimmykins Follow her blog, Twitter and Instagram
Day 14: A personal account of how my fiancé first told me he loves me by @luvandlifestyle
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It is so true that the day isn’t about what you spend but who you spend it with. Such a lovely post
Lovely post I agree I will defo be looking at destinations me and bae want to go later this year!
Nice ideas in here! I am not a huge Valentines fan but we do exchange cards and I make heart shaped pancakes for the boys 💖
I agree so much that it is about who you spend it with!
Lovely post. There is so much pressure on Valentine’s but actually I think it should be stripped back and we should make time for ourselves as a couple and remind ourselves and then how special they are x
Really lovely post, so much truth! Every day is Valentine’s day when you’re with the one you like, but it’s nice to take time to get that date night in especially on Valentine’s!
Maybe many live that way every day and don’t need that day to be romantic ? Just a thought. I love going out the next day when fixed price meals that are overpriced aren’t the norm… but then again that’s my idea of romance bucking trends. And love the idea of a makeup tutorial. I may just have to treat myself 🙂
I like the idea of taking advantage of those who allow you the opportunity to go on a date or have a nice night of self care!
This is a new way of thinking of Valentine’s day. I’m going to give this a try. Thank you for sharing!
My husband is anti Valentine’s Day in the sense that he prefers to do acts of love all the time, without a special day. I like all the pageantry of the day, but reading your post is making me rethink. Maybe a compromise can be reached.
I’ve always thought valentines day but as stupid, and never once in my life (or 10 years of marriage) recieved anything on Valentine’s Day. But this year I’m looking forward to it. My new boyfriend have brought romance back into my life and even if we aren’t together on Valentine’s Day I’m still looking forward to it for the first time 😍
This is such a great post! I love that you teamed up with other bloggers for even more ideas on how to celebrate Valentine’s Day. And I agree with you, making the time for you significant other and just doing something special for them is the most important thing you can do!
Bit broke this year so for me just not working and staying away from social media will make it a good day. I can see why people can take it back etc but gotta move house and pack quite shortly this time round… plus I’m just a little anti Valentine’s Day. Didn’t like it when I was single, don’t like dealing with how it makes others feel now. But I do get why people are trying to take it back as a holiday about love rather than buying goods.
Such a lovely idea! Thank you for sharing your thoughts!
These are great ideas – I have always been cynical about Valentine’s Day but you have made me re-think it. I especially like the thought of using it to spend some quality time together, to talk properly and to reflect. 🙂
This is such a lovely post 😊 we’ll probably not do much this valentines but maybe have a nice meal and watch a movie together x
Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be expensive, so many people don’t even realize you can gift without shopping by doing something thoughtful like making a favorite meal.
I agree with you and think it’s less about the money and more about doing something nice together. Even if that’s just making an effort to eat dinner together and sit down and watch a movie x
We tend to celebrate our wedding anniversary rather than a focus on Valentine’s Day. Although we will treat ourselves to one of the supermarket meal deals (no childcare so no chance of going out)
For me it’s about making the time too – and saying the words you may not say in such a way throughout the year
I love how are you team up with others to create a nice pose! This post was amazing!
I think making the time is something we should all do and if it means there is one day that makes us do it, then it is worth celebrating x
Great reminder to make this holiday what we want it to be and to create some good memories. I agree that it’s not about buying gifts but appreciating those you love by letting them know. Thanks for the sweet post.
Enjoyed reading your blog ! I think it is all about who you spend it with that counts.
Such a true post. I quite enjoy Valentines Day.
I agree! It is so important to say the words to your partner either verbally or written down. And reminiscing and dreaming together is so important too.
I’ve never really celebrated Valentine’s day but as this year my husband and I are kid free we are planning a quiet date night in. To be fair though we do that any night when we don’t have the kids.
I’m usually someone who doesn’t have much time for valentines day and always thought it was only for people in a couple (which I currently am not). But after reading this and several other blog posts I think the idea of just using it as a day to let any type of loved ones know how much they mean to you is actually quite nice. Sometimes we get so caught up in work and forget to do this, so valentines day is the perfect way to bring us back to reality!
We tend to include our kids nowadays and have a family Valentines celebration with good food, treats and a film or games night. Mich x
This is a great way to think about Valentines! Whilst me and my husband don’t like to spend too much money on the day itself it really doesn’t have to cost much. Sometimes I just cook him his favourite tea and get him a card. x
I totally agree – while the capitalism and pressure can be a bit much, I still like to celebrate the meaning of Valentine’s Day… love! I don’t buy gifts, but prefer to write cute little poems or make something to show my love!
You’re absolutely right! Valentine’s Day is what you make of it! It can be nothing but commercialism, or it can be a wonderful chance to show your loved ones how much you care. This is such a lovely post! Thank you so much for sharing! 💖
A lovely way to approach Valentine’s Day with less hype and more meaning
We should show our love everyday but it’s quite nice to have a day to make a bit of a fuss too. It has got a bit too commercialised though.
We did the story of St. Valentine at Brownies this week. I’m not sure I’d actually heard it before!
I totally agree that Valentines Day is only about money if you make it about the money. It was never about big gifts or fancy dinners for us. And this year we plan on having a movie night as a family 🙂
Fab post. I have to agree that we should be sharing our love with those around us more often. It shouldn’t be reserved for Valentine’s Day.
We don’t tend to do anything other than sending cards on valentines day and this year we will be travelling, so probably won’t even be doing that
I love your attitude as mine is similar. I believe it is not only worth making this day special. It’s vital pause and reflect every now and then. It is vital to practice gratefulness. It is vital to reconnect with our close ones as we are usually in such a hurry that we forget about just being together. And Valentine’s Day is a good occasion to do all of that.
This is so cool. I wanna try all of these things with my future partner T_T
So true. It’s all about how you think about Valentine’s Day and how we experience it. It doesn’t have to be about the money. It can be about spending time with the people you love and taking time to let them know how you feel and that you appreciate them. Because let’s be honest, we never do this enough